How to fight the second half of life

I turned 45. The day was October 13.

There are still things I want to get done. Being able to support myself. I want to establish something I earn with my own hands, rather than making a living as a salaried employee, and live on that. I want to face it seriously, and work at it.

Feeling well is no longer a given. My stamina is on the way down too. Stamina is capital. I think the capital is myself.

I started jogging again. The same running I used to do. I start at 2km, add 1km once I can run it as a normal thing, and only go on to the next kilometer after that new distance feels normal, taking it up to about 10km. My weight has gotten harder to lose. Dieting is not the main point. I do want to get close to my usual weight.

The other day I wrote "AI didn't make anyone happy." This is the paradox of that piece, but being able to cover the implementation stamina I am losing with AI is a big deal. I want to reach for things that used to be hard to actually build, and ship products without holding back.

I do not want to become somebody. If I had to say, I want to stay nobody in particular, and live naturally, the way my heart goes. I do not want a vast fortune. I do not want achievements I can brag about. I want to live the way my heart goes, and I want to do things I have never done.

This year I went to Hokkaido with my family. I want to see places I do not know, and widen what I have seen.

I want more of a life that involves other people. A local event is fine, and so are friends who share a hobby. I used to think getting involved with people was only a bother, but lately I have started to notice that I actually like living while being involved with them.